Putting balm on the soul one Korean drama at a time!

In the summer of 2023, I was ordering room service in my hotel room in #Cairo and thinking about how I will do my hair for the wedding of my bestie's daughter the next day. While waiting for my shrimp cocktail salad and fries, I started browsing Netflix for something to help me unwind. 

It was an #emotional time for me, I had just learned of some bad news regarding the sequel to my spine injury at the same time I was thinking that if I had not been single my children would be of marrying age at the very least now. It was also hard because our best friend had passed away sometime ago, and never did I imagine that anyone of us would be missing each other’s milestone days. It did not help that this was the first time in a decade that I was making clear efforts to be at purely social events unrelated to business following my mother's passing away. I had forgotten the excitement of choosing a dress, make up, hairstyle, jewelry, presents and was a bit apprehensive of getting out there on the dance floor. #Egyptian parties are famous for tons of fun. I thought I might also run into some middle aged, fit and attractive silver haired guy who would sweep me off my feet with his charm and smart conversation. I guess I’m still a romantic at heart….

So while flipping through the suggestions in my profile suddenly a number of Korean titles came up. My first experience of #Asian culture was a visit to a #Chinese trade mission expo  in #Mauritania in the early 70s. I cannot remember the exact date of the event but I still have the beautiful doll, porcelain and vases we acquired. My next exposure funnily enough during the same period was #Bruce Lee’s chiseled body among the audience at a Nouakchott cinema.The fight scenes and storyline were easy to follow. I’m not sure if there were English/French subtitles because at that time I only spoke Arabic and had recently learned to read in  French in elementary school. I just loved all #Kung Fu movies, the flying kicks, the screaming and #ninja stuff before Ninjas were made popular by #Hollywood. I had a field day at home practicing with help from Mbarek and Amadou our household staff members. I think they were about 16 or less at that time and we would enact the jumping scenes at home. We would layer mattresses on the floor to avoid injury and then jump from a high vantage point usually the terrace or even the roof.I saw lots of movies of the Chinese revolution too and enjoyed them immensely. Every week it was a treat to go to the #cinema and watch either kung fu, or #Hindi or some cowboy movies. In the Hindi movies, you cried and sang and your heart was moved and you had fun for 3 hours straight. I still want to rewatch my favourite one now as a grown up but cannot remember the title. It was black and white and no it’s not the famous 1957 Mother India (which I also watched with a crying audience back then too). The cowboy movies honestly felt weird as I was rooting for the Indian protagonist in the plot and could not understand why they had to be killed. As an Arab living in an African country, I just did not get why could these American dudes not live together with those who were obviously the rightful owners of the land…

To get back to #Netflix, I like that the platform offers me a choice from all over the world. I spent  3 years watching Spanish and Portuguese speaking series and movies pre and post Covid from all across the countries that have variations of these beautiful languages.

Then I moved on to the Northern European scene, with Danish, Norwegian, Swedish and other production. Of course I had my favourite Hollywood sagas like Star Wars – which I loved watching when it premieres in any country I would be in.

So while browsing the different sections my eye was caught by the trailer of a Korean historical drama set in the Joseon dynasty: “The King’s Affection”. My only experience with South Korean film production was the movie #Parasite in 2019, which honestly I watched because it was in vogue… I may want to rewatch again. I never saw the #Squid Games. So here I was with the King and court intrigues, I had finished the dinner and could not stop watching. It’s been a year and I never turned back. To the point of when #Dune part II premiered this year (and which I was anticipating for a long time), I shamefully fell asleep. I was dumbfounded for days afterwards. What happened?

While watching South Korean drama I realized that it felt like being with your own tribe, I felt like I belonged, the jokes were fun, the characters felt like long lost friends and neighbours, the story lines were rich and full of details, the joy, the sadness, the anger, the longing, the rage, the loneliness, the pride, the success … etc.. all the emotions were there, including the trauma, the shameful past, the ordinary and the extraordinary, the experience, the sweetness, the tone of voice, the jealousy, the grit, the courage, the adolescence, the youth, the middle age, the senior years, the fantastic, the death, the birth, the mental illness and even menopause was referenced. Yes, it is drama, but you know what? drama references real life experiences. I learned about Korean #culture and fell in love with it ( I know now I am not the only one ), I learned about food, I discovered beautiful places and became curious about the history. I also learned about where I have made mistakes in my life and found out what truly inspires me and what should be my next steps. As the months passed I could watch and understand a lot without subtitles, I also forgave myself for things I had no control over. I laughed hard and cried even harder. Of course we all love happy endings, but even when that did not occur I knew why and accepted it. It was refreshing to watch something without worrying about nudity, it was amazing that murder scenes and crime could be portrayed, and you would know it was absolutely gory without the streams of blood in western movies and without any crudity. The soundtrack of my favourite series somehow ended up on my playlist and slowly the whole #playlist became solely Korean. The drama brought me back to my original self, to my firm #principles of hard work, family priority, loyalty, friendship love and courage, but also reminded me that it was ok to feel pain, to heal, to acknowledge and express my emotions to others. The dramas reminded me that it was ok to keep looking for the love that I always dreamt about. Who says it does not exist or that there is an expiry limit ? I deserve my own “oppa”. It made me come to terms with many things that were holding me back and threatened to change who I really was. The dramas gave me a reset and revived the person who had been overwhelmed with #grief for the past decade and now the #pain is bearable, and I have an outline of a plan to tackle it.

Lately I became a Korean #pop fan, something I never thought would happen to me, so never say never ….I ended up buying a lot of travel books on South Korea and am already familiar with the public transport system without stepping a foot there. I am reading a number of Korean books translated into English and have purchased Korean language learning courses. I have already tried the sentences I picked up in dramas when I went to Korean restaurants and other places frequented by Korean tourists during my travels. My next plan is a trip to South Korea in 2025 and being able to sing my favourite tunes during Karaoke… I’m even considering attending a #BTS concert!

Yes I know it's a boyband and they are  such fun :)

It is only when researching Korean drama that I realized what I was feeling was an actual global phenomenon described as “Korean Wave” or hallyu which refers to culture, food, fashion, music etc... I also felt validated when I discovered a book by a therapist (Jeanie Chang)  who uses Korean drama to help her patients heal. 

It is such fun to reveal you are a #Kdrama fan in social settings, it starts different lines of communication, banter and most times you end up making new friends. 

Now my head turns instinctively
when I hear a Korean conversation and my whole #timeline has evolved to one that brings me courage and hope… I even found an interesting public figure to have a crush on ... (can you guess who he is from the video?)  he he he ….